I'm So Glad I Resumed Doing This.
Photo by Jan Kahánek on Unsplash
Hello friends,
I wanted to share with you something that I recently got back into and that I’m so glad I did: journaling.
Back when I was first starting my self-improvement journey, one tip that I constantly saw was to keep a journal. By doing so, it’s supposed to help you organize your thoughts and clear your mind. Soon after, I bought my first hardcover journal and got to work. I opted for a dotted journal since lots of the blogs and videos I was following suggested them because they were more dynamic in how you could write in them.
For context, before I began journaling, my days would mush together into a haze with no metrics of tracking my goals. It was disheartening, honestly, to see the time fly by and me having nothing to show for it.
I’ll definitely say that journaling helped immediately. One of the first things I did was to create a snapshot of the upcoming month with a row for each day and a column for the most important things for me to accomplish. It looked like this:
My Habit Tracker for April 2021.
I continued this habit tracker for a few months but gradually fell off. I think the reason for this was because tracking my habits day by day was great at first in helping me structure my life and keeping me accountable, but eventually it seemed to become a chore (virtually obligatory) to record my results, and I’m not one to continue doing something if it no longer serves its purpose for me.
At the same time I tracking my daily habits, I used my journal for more common purposes: writing an overall summary of my month, brainstorming ideas for content, drafting rough drawings that I would later turn into graphics for articles, and purging some general thoughts.
A couple of weeks ago, I got back to the journal with a clean slate. No expectations, no plans for a particular format, just an intention to write down whatever I need, want, and feel.
Honestly, it’s been great.
It feels a lot like when you play a video game that you used to love, or re-watching a favorite movie from when you were younger. Some things just hold up and starting over feels just as good as the first time.
What my journal has been used for in this “Version 2.0” has been primarily for note-taking and creating rough drafts for future articles, videos, and podcast episodes. This feels almost academic in a sense, and it makes me feel like I’m learning new things and at the same time creating valuable content for others. At this time in my life, these are what make me feel accomplished in terms of journaling, but that might change down the road. Maybe I’ll start habit tracking again or resume “diary” entries.
My closing message to you is to consider getting a journal of your own and tailoring it to your own needs. I think as long as you are letting out your mind in some capacity then you’re doing it right. If you’re an artist, draw in it. If you’re an avid reader, take notes. If you want to connect with me personally, send me an e-mail at alan@alanrr.com and tell me how you journal. With your permission, I can share your methodology with other readers and we can all grow together.
Thanks for reading,
Alan
Additional Resources
The Bullet Journal by Ryder Carroll was the one that really ignited the journaling craze of recent times, which in turn inspired me. Full of visuals and actionable steps, it’s a great antidote to the anxiety of a blank page.
There’s also an official YouTube channel for the bullet journal where the creator of the method (Ryder Carroll) goes over different strategies and uses for the journal in case you prefer real-time explanations.
The journal that I use is pretty similar to this one, but it really doesn’t matter which one you use (although I do think dotted pages are more effective for visuals)
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The Process Behind Decision-Making
Photo by Javier Allegue Barros on Unsplash
Every single moment of our lives involves decision-making in some capacity. There are small choices, such as what you’ll wear that day or what you’ll make for lunch. Then there are choices with a moderate impact, such as which car you’ll purchase or whether you want to make a lifestyle habit of going to the gym. Finally, there are the big choices: marriage, children, job selection, the list goes on. But do you know exactly why we make the choices we make? It goes beyond a simple list of pros and cons (though this system can be beneficial in its own right.)
Basically, all of the decisions that we make we make to satisfy at least one of six emotional necessities:
Certainty
Variety
Significance
Connection/Love
Growth*
Contribution*
(*these last two drive our spiritual needs. The first four drive our personality.)In the example of certainty, one might opt to continue working a traditional job (which is more or less secure) instead of starting a business (not so secure because it requires an initial investment and may fail).
For variety, this can come in the form of making the leap and moving to another city of country. For those who value this need highly, monotony gets old very quickly.
A decision made with significance at the forefront would be giving into peer pressure and consuming drugs with a group of people in order to feel important and like you belong.
A decision made on the basis of connection would be to go to a social gathering or to ask someone to marry you.
Growth would be going on a weeklong meditation retreat.
And finally, contribution would be volunteering at a food drive to give back to members of the community.
Of course, decisions can overlap in any one of these categories. Taking a new job is a mix of variety and certainty. Drinking socially is often as much about connection as it is about significance. Participating in activities that give back oftentimes grows the character at the same time.
One crucial thing to note is that the first four needs are not a permanent fix. What I mean by this is that you’ll never find lasting fulfillment by chasing activities fueled by these motivations. For genuine self-development, you must look beyond yourself and your superficial desires- you must look to the last two emotional needs. I don’t say this to sound “holier than thou”- we all have recreational past times. It’s just imperative that we prioritize our own evolution over cheap thrills.
Along the same lines, we must equally dissect our decision-making tendencies. We must constantly ask ourselves why we’re doing the things we do. This requires serious candor and a commitment to open up to ourselves. Is what we’re doing right for us? Is the need for approval from someone/some people so great that we resort to doing things we don’t really want? Can the variety that we seek be found through alternative means?
Thanks for reading,
Alan
Additional Resources
The idea for this article came from a close friend and family member, who in turn was inspired by this video by Tony Robbins (there is also a written version.)
While researching this topic, I was reminded of Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs. The Six Needs match up almost perfectly to the levels on the pyramid: certainty to safety and physiological needs, connection to belongingness, significance to esteem, and growth and contribution to self-actualization. So this isn’t a new concept.
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The Beauty of Books
Photo by Alfons Morales on Unsplash
We often say that we wish we could sit down and have a face-to-face conversation with someone long gone, or even someone still living yet on the other side of the globe. While it’s true that there’s nothing like an intimate in-person interaction, there is something nearly as valuable: reading.
If you’ve ever found yourself confused and wondered how the Dalai Lama would respond in your situation, you can pick up one of his many works and find an answer. Maybe there’s a social struggle happening and you want to understand and empathize more with the oppressed group; Susan B. Anthony and Martin Luther King Jr. are there to help you. One needs to stop viewing books as just pieces of paper with text and start seeing them as guides to wisdom.
The beauty of books is that they allow you to jump into its pages and immerse yourself in its ideas- to put it more accurately, to immerse yourself in the mind of its writer. Books are the product of the thoughts, experiences, struggles, and conclusions of the author. A piece of them is contained within the words of the pages, and I think that’s beautiful.
Even fiction books have their significance; they exercise the imagination of the reader and are crucial to cultivating wonder and creativity. It’s clear to see why they’re popular among children. It’s unfortunate that for whatever reason, whether it’s the educational system or the jest of peers, young readers grow out of this past time and hardly ever pick up another book for the rest of their life. Cover-to-cover books are replaced by 280 character tweets and brief news articles. Even adults claim that they lack the time to read. To that I say that it’s not the time they lack, but rather reading simply isn’t a priority. Keep in mind that they need not actually sit down and read; if they truly are pressed for time, they could always listen to an audiobook on their commute or read a paragraph or two on an e-book on their break.
If you think about it, reading is the closest thing to a superpower that we have. It allows us to time travel, voyage to infinite worlds, get inside the minds of others, expand our own minds, and talk to the dead. It really is a pure conduit for self-actualization.
In most places in the world, books are one of the most accessible sources of knowledge, so do yourself a favor and pay a visit to your nearest library. The dividends are far too great to ignore.
Thanks for reading,
Alan
Additional Resources
Visit my book list for suggestions on some of my favorite titles. Most of what I read centers around self-help and spirituality, but I do occasionally have a fiction title in my rotation.
This video on rediscovering books by one of my absolute favorite creators (coincidentally) contains many of the same points written in this article. I think it’s pretty cool that we independently arrived at the same conclusion.
As with all things, reading takes practice. It may not be the best idea to dive directly into a 500 page book, so start with a shorter and “less academic” book if you want to get started.
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Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy and Stoicism: How an ancient philosophy influenced modern-day science
Over 2,000 years ago, thinkers meeting in the Stoa Poikile marketplace¹ would unknowingly create a lasting philosophy that would come to influence political leaders and laypeople of all ages, from Ancient Rome to the 21st century. This virgin philosophy, considered more so as a way of life by its practitioners, stressed the importance of living an ethical and virtuous life. Of course, this philosophy is Stoicism.
In a massively simplified TL;DR, Stoics believe in living in accordance with nature. Nature, in this context, refers to the reality and laws that govern the universe. Stoics place significance on accepting things as just as they are- there is no such thing as good or bad, reality simply is. It is one’s attitude that dictates their perception of the situation. By adopting an equanimous view towards life, mental suffering can be greatly reduced. Humans, in the eyes of the Stoics, all have the capacity for virtue and reason², and by living a life according to these principles can they fall out of the trap of mental ignorance. Thus, Stoicism is a philosophy of action rather than being a mere mental notion (although contemplation, especially of death, does play an important aspect in Stoicism). If you are familiar with Buddhism, these words might greatly resemble the Four Noble Truths.
A visual depicting the Stoic view on passions, or common human sentiments.¹
Fast-forward to the 20th century and a new psychoanalytical method is born: cognitive-behavioral therapy. CBT is an approach that seeks to delve into the true root causes of our negative thoughts and habits (hence the name cognitive-behavioral) and take action towards improving them.³ It is used to treat psychological problems such as depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, addictions, and disorders. The founders of CBT, Albert Ellis and Aaron T. Beck, openly stated that most of their work was primarily influenced by philosophy (both Eastern and Western) rather than traditional psychology.⁴ Just have look for yourself at the five ways cognitive-behavioral therapy works⁴:
Monitoring of negative automatic cognitions
Evaluation of the relationship between thoughts, feelings, and actions
Evaluation of evidence for and against the extreme mental cognitions
Generation of alternative mental cognitions to replace the negative ones
Identification and modification of underlying thoughts that lead to negative predispositions and beliefs
When all of the scientific lingo is brushed aside, the essence of CBT is to turn negative attitudes into positive ones, or at least non-negative ones. Does this not resemble what the Stoics said about changing negative mental attitudes through logic and reasoning? To observe present emotions and thoughts? Even Marcus Aurelius, probably the most famous Stoic of all time, said,
“The happiness of your life depends on the quality of your thoughts.”
The triad of our thoughts, behaviors, and emotions all cyclicly influence each other.⁵
In an age where information can spread globally in just seconds, it’s easy to get caught up in what seems to be an endless funnel of negativity and despair. However, it is also times like these where Stoic wisdom can resonate beautifully. Observe situations for exactly how they are, live justly, and reflect often to avoid falling into a state of despair. Most importantly, take care of your mental wellbeing. Simply by deciding to take a small step in the right direction can our perception of the present situation drastically improve.
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Additional Resources
An incredible list of mental health resources from one of my favorite creators, Nathaniel Drew.
Meditations, perhaps the most well-known text of all time on Stoic philosophy.
This article by ThoughtCo. is an excellent read for a brief rundown on basic Stoic principles.
A YouTube video of a mock CBT session outlines the structure of cognitive-behavioral therapy and the origins of our negative perceptions of ourselves.
A rundown on CBT, including its history, applications, and methods for achieving goals.
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